In which Simmy plays like Simmy, not Simmy fucking 3k!

So this weekend was the G Cup team event down at the G. I was playing, for the last time, for Team Ninja.

I'm not really going to review the event too much, other than to pick out a couple of interesting hands and how I reacted and such. Starting with 7500 and a 40 minute clock, let's jump right in.

Early doors I three bet A8s against perceived weakness and take a nice multiway pot down on an Ahigh board. I then play some suited connectors in position, make a loose (advertising) snapcall with King High vs Mrmagoogle in a small pot and I'm on about 8500 when I open QQ UTG to 225 UTG at 50/100 and get flatted by both the CO (relatively spazzy, prolly flatting ATPrettyC because of tight BTN and my LAGtard image) and the BTN (tighest player at table, confused by the coldcall) before Nemesis (my team, captain, capable of squeezing wide) makes it 625. I'm getting prepared to 4bet before Alison (mrsfatfish, playing real good and TAGgy) pops it to 1625. I tank fold. Nemesis flashes the As as he folds and Alison mucks. I think she prolly shows a bluff so I think good fold. I also don't think she 4bets AK out of position. With AA she probably flats and  hopes I shove. I guess I ran into the other two Queens (nice bet) or KK (nice hand and nice bet) or the Azbo (super bet, and I'm never ahead). There's always a chance she has AA though. A friend of mine says that however weirdly the hand plays out, there is always an 8% chance that they have AA. A maxim I live by!

I claim I folded JJ as I just don't think folding QQ suits my laggy image at this table.

Anyway, a little later I open T8s in late position, flop 2 pair on a drawy board, bet three streets and get raised on the end by mrmagoogle. I sigh, wonder if he waits till the river to raise a straight or set on a 2 heart board but decide he doesn't, call and my top2 is good for a nice pot.

I'm up to about 13000 when the crucial hand occurs. Simmy3k has just moved to our table and joined the tournament. I know him to be LAGgy as hell and capable of all sorts of moves. His third hand in, he makes it 550 at 75/150 in the hijack and I flat the button with 22. Now a reasonably tight player in the BB Pam overcalls for value. As she does this, I turn to Simmy and announce 'great, I need the pot to be multiway for my hand' and he says 'pfft, I just wanted it heads up'. There's 1725 in the pot and we see the flop:

4c 5c 9x

BB checks (I don't think she check-raises a lot at all, so suspect there's a check-fold coming, or, if she has a draw, maybe a check-call) and Simmy obv cbets 850 pretty fast. I think raising here is the best line because:

1. I likely have the best hand as that board doesn't hit Simmy's range that much.

2. I need to protect my hand, and as an added bonus, price out the BB if they're on a draw.

3. I can represent a set or a huge draw given my speech about 'needing the pot to be multiway'.

4. Simmy doesn't know I've been laggy so a raise reps a pretty narrow range, I think.

5. If I get flat called I can reevaluate on the turn. So yeah, I'm raising for value and for information.

Anyway, you may disagree, please let me know in the comments if you do, but I make it 2300. This makes the total pot 4875, and Simmy has to put 1450 more in. Given that he started the hand with 7500, he'll have almost half his stack in if he flats.

He tanks. For a looooonnng time. About 5 minutes. In the end, he looks resigned and just slides his chips over the line. All 6950 of them (including the 850). So, the pot is 10975 and I have to call another 4650 from my ~11k remaining stack. Let's consider his range:

1. He doesn't have sets or twopair, like, ever, because he jams quicker. Like instaquick. I don't think he was acting, he was genuinely trying to decide how to play his hand facing a raise.

2. For the same reason, I rule QQ+ almost all of the time and TT/JJ lots of the time (i think he flats and reevaluates those hands, and moves in with QQ+ quicker).

3. He has 66,77,88 here a fair amount of the time, I think. Maybe 20% of the time he turns up with one of those hands.

3. He has clubs here, a lot, I think. Like wider than AcXc and including like KcXc, QcJc, maybe even wider, I think (given the image I have of him). Obviously when he has clubs -- I have the 2c, kindofa blocker ;) -- he also has two overs, which is basically a flip. Given the money in the middle (remember, 4650 more into almost 11k) I make the auto call for how often he has just clubs.

He shows KK. Ooops. No help for me and down to like 6k or so.

I then play really badly, don't adjust to my new stacksize and finally shove 4200 over Simmys open with A9s and he has KK, again.

Thoughts on the key hand?

As a test: If you were shown AKcc by simmy when he moved in, and you'd still fold, you're wrong. A couple of people said that too me at the break. I haven't heard a convincing argument for why I should fold here (when shown 2overs and FD) yet, so I'll continue to assume it would be optimal to call.

Anyway, comments appreciated and well done to Dobba Knights for the record and to all who played. Well done to Dan Trett for being more hungover than me and for tempting me pre-tourney with Nandos, too.

Editing blogpost title given comments.

Today is a bad day....

So I have to work tonight, which means that I've had a couple of extra hours sleep in the afternoon to prepare me for the nightshift.

I've woken up to a barrage of 'WTF?!?!?!' text messages from colleagues and after a bit of digging I managed to find out. Most of our entire team is at the risk of redundancy because the Client is moving business elsewhere. Fuck.

I feel absolutely horrid.

UPDATE: The entire team, including me, is at risk of redundancy. What's worse is that the consultation period will be little more than a formality, and that, sometime within the next 90 days, I won't have a job.

Here's the thing. I've been looking, for a while, for a new job, but I thought that I'd always have the safety net of being here to fall back on. There are two ways of looking at this:

1. Ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffuck the world is falling down.OR
2. Ok, that's that then, nothing we can do, let's use this as the impetus to find a killer job in the time I have left.

As a colleague described it, if a plane slams into the side of a prison, you can either lament the structural damage to the prison itself, or you can just fucking escape. Pretty simple choice if you think about it, and I want to make the most of this horrible spot to kick forward in my career.

I'll miss the craic here in the office. There is no exaggeration on my part when I say that all of the people I work with are fucking top class. Honestly, you couldn't hope to work with a better bunch of people. They truely are superb and I'll miss working with every single one of them.

I'll probably take voluntary redundancy if it's offered, though. Just seems like a good spot to move on.

This is the second time in a little under two years when I've been at risk of redundancy, but whilst there was a realistic chance that I'd keep my job last time, that just isn't the case this time. Let's hope I can make lemons out of lemonade.

If anyone has suggestions for jobs, serious or otherwise (I could do with cheering up!) then let me know in the comments. For reference, I have a law degree, speak 4 languages to various degrees of fluency and am learning a fifth. I have amazing chops in Customer Service and Fraud Mitigation and (still) lead a team of 50 people.

I know this isn't the end of the world.

--mulhuzz

In which I don't actually update much, at all...

So it's been about a week since I blogged last, and basically, I've not played any poker.

As part of my self-imposed exile until the G Cup at the end of the month, I've really just been taking time to guide my fantasy football team to glory (I've had a nightmare of a weekend, thanks for asking...) and generally hitting the job trail hard. I've applied for a couple of nice positions, and heard some positive things back from some other jobs that are in the pipeline. That's one part of my 'new hotness' done.

Other than that I've been working hard at work to fuck the auditors we've had in the office recently. Basically, this was an Operational Processes audit, and we scored 93%. Hold the fistpumping and cartwheeling though folks, we still failed. You can file that under W for 'What. The. Fucking. Fuck.' (indeed, I have). Apparently it's appropriate to have a scoring system that prohibits the passing of said audit. I'm appealing, obviously, especially in the light of the fact that nobody in the UK has ever scored more than 85%, and they still thought we failed here. Fuck them, tbh.

My parents are on holiday currently, so I'm spending a good amount of time at their place looking after things and enjoying the big screen TV, just a shame I have to work tonight and can't see NUFC get tanked away to Man-fucking-Yooo as they're known in my house. Actually, Rooney's in my fantasy football team, so if we have to get tanked, please let him score all the goals.

Stuff I'm reading today:

German singer Nadja Benaissa apologises at HIV trial
This is a pretty interesting article, and actually, the law as it applies to the UK is interesting. Ideas of consent and intent play heavily on the judiciary in deciding such cases. As I think I've mentioned before, the idea of the Criminal Law is that which most appeals to me, and should I ever work as a solicitor, it'd be for the Crown as a Prosecutor. Just unfortunate that they are in the midst of a 3 year hiring freeze which isn't likely to get better anytime soon.


Spotify SVP Paul Brown leaves for new startup
Please don't be the beginning of the end for Spotify. I love them. Even though I don't have a phone to use it on, thanks, Carphone Warehouse, you bunch of cunts. That's another story entirely, though. I should point out that nothing in this post should be construed as liabliing Carphone Warehouse. Your complete and utter moronic treatment of me means that this comment would fall under the defense of Fair Comment. For the avoidance of doubt, no malice is either intended or inferred. Ok, rant over.


Stephen Fry's Newspaper
In the words of Scroobius Pip, "thou shall not question Stephen Fry". That being the case, get reading.

I'll leave you with the image a colleague drew of me. On a whiteboard. In the middle of the office:

Awesome Sauce.

Peace, Love and Grapes,

--mulhuzz

In which I start a Revolution....

A short update today, but first, a disclaimer:

When I say 'I' start a revolution, I of course mean that Roscopiko has started a Revolution. Most references to 'I' in this post should be taken to mean 'the collective work of others whose glorious coattails I've clung to for dear life'. All rights reserved. Terms and Conditions apply. 

Recently Pads retired from the NPF, and teamdobbs and s2c made the decision to formally announce the creation of a new team to replace the Cubs, the team which Pads led for some time. Their first job was to announce a new glorious leader for this new glorious future. Enter Rosco.

Rosco's first job, then, was to select a team and how he'd like to run it. Needless to say, I think Rosco has excellent taste, not least because he's seen fit to ask me to take part as a regular team member, alongside a great mix of players, who, most importantly, are all excellent banter. You can read all about that here. The name, lest you hadn't seen the link, is NPF Revolution.

What I wanted to talk about here though, is Rosco's idea of having an inclusive, extended team. The idea is basically that he's picked 8 people as 'regs' who will always have the first option to play in any event for which the Revolution are putting together a team.  The other two spots will be left open, and left to Rosco to pick players on a 'per event' basis. This is another cunning tactic. I know what you're thinking. Rosco is going to pick the players that are running like fucking God at the time. Nope. That's not how the Revolution roll -- see what I did there? -- he's going to pick players based on their commitment, no, contribution, to the forum.

What's happened here is that Rosco has immediately created 2 spots for newer, non-affiliated, NPFers to get involved in the banter of the team games. All they have to do is get involved. Which can only be good for forum participation and the community at large. Rumours that they'll be subjected to an X-Factor style audition are probably wide of the mark, which is, of course, also good for forum participation.

I like this idea, I really do. When I first joined the NPF, about 2 years too late, I quickly threw myself into posting, commenting and getting involved in the general banter. Then there was the first 'official' NPF Event, the hallowed NPF UK Team Challenge. I wasn't in a team. I really wanted to play. These events were rumoured to be the best banter ever invented. Fortunately, I was invited to play for s2c's Elite Team, which is an invitation only team put together by Scott. I had a great time. I cemented friendships and online personalities, met new people, saw CGK rock the mike, allsorts. All of that wouldn't have happened without an invitation to play in s2c's team. So anything at all that extends the pool of available slots in teams for this type of game is a fucking great idea s far as I'm concerned.

wp Rosco, wp teamdobbs and s2c, up the Revolution!

--Mulhuzz

In which I play like a hero, then a tard, then a hero again.....

So it's been a short while since I've blogged, and I won't do the whole 'apologies' thing, I wouldn't want anyone to think I was the kind of person that expected they ever had anything interesting to say and that hoards of poker players refresh this page everyday just to see what inane tripe I've written this time. That would make me a righteous prick, eh Mark Trett? (in joke alert!)

Anyway, the week started really for me last Saturday night at the G Triple Chance £20 Freezeout. I've honestly not played so perfectly for a long time, but it's such an easy game sometimes when you get AA three times and proceed to either flop or turn top set on dry boards in multiway pots each time. You still have to get paid though, and anyone on my table for at least one of the hands will probably tell you I gave some of the best speechplay you've ever heard to induce a shove when I 'squeeze' the button over a cutoff minraise and get called all in by one player and then a player with 9s completes the bet and somehow conspires to jam on me for a pot size bet on an ATx board. Yeah, cue the Hellmuth snapadooooooooooodle call. ;)

Later in the tournament, once the bubble breaks myself and Apokerlypse are apparently they only players that aren't trying to ladder. I'm shoving every unopened pot and some nit-tard folds AQo when I jam from the button -- after checking my cards I had 9Ts and was definitely getting there lol -- and basically Mac and I abuse the shit out of all these invisi-bubbles. We end up chopping at 5:45am, mainly because I have to be at work at 7am. Sigh.

Later that day (it's now Sunday, right?) I head to Circus for their first annual HU tournament. I had such high hopes for this tournament as I consider myself a solid HUps player. Unfortunately, out of all the tards playing this game, I get drawn one of maybe 6 or 7 people with the skillz to pay teh billz -- Choppa/Goldfoxdom. We're going back and forth, snapping each other's bluffs, making thin value bets and calls and generally having a good time. In the first round best of one, with a constant 25/50 structure and starting with 7500 we've been playing about an hour and are about even when I threebet from the BB with QJo. (standard). Dom flats with KJo (standard) and..ladies and gents, here's your cooler flop: T9Qdd. I lead for about 3/4s pot, and Dom insta minraises. I think he does this with all his flushdraws and twopair hands (and I have so much equity against those hands) and even some total airy bluffs, too) that I just jam for value. Yeah, he snapadooooooodles of course (as you do, with the nuts.....) -- somehow I avoid a K for a chop and even a diamond on the turn gives me backdoor diamonds but I whiff.

Oh well. Dom played the hand pretty perfect knowing that I have to jam for value with a LOT of the hands I'm leading with, esp since I'm OOP. Which is super-profitable when you have the nuts, obv. Even when I don't jam, does anyone fold to a min-raise these days? I doubt it. I could flat, but what do I do on most turns? Fuck all, probably. Check/fold? Maybe.

I'm persuaded by Nemesis to play some cash later and with a double straddle on, I find AA and make it £13 to go. Scotty asks how much I'm playing and tank-3bets to £26. Choppa, with about that stack, shoves for value and I overjam for doublerainbow value. Scotty sigh calls and the flop of KQT is pretty horrid for me, but I hold and win a nice pot for a double up plus. I win a few more pots and then go to get food before playing in the £20+£20.

This is another tournament in which I play like a tard. Actually, all is going superwell and I'm building a stack nicely (until TJ tilts me, angleshoots me and threatens to throw a bunch of chips in my face, real mature -- ask me about it sometime if you want the details). Anyway, with a 30k stack ish, I raise early with KJ and get two callers. I lead the J high flop and I'm tank check-shoved on by Irish Mark in the BB. I instaread him for a (semi)bluff and snap, nicely holding against A9 (no spades on a two spade board), I also have the Ks, which means he can't be freerolling against me....

Some hands later, I'm in the BB with 55. Adam Brown(?) has limped UTG and I peg him for like AJ/KQ/etc and raise-squeeze. He's the only caller and I lead the Ahigh flop and he sigh calls. There's no way I'm giving up on this pot now he's sighing. I turn and river and he tanks for a long time on the river, convinces himself I have a set and calls anyway, meh. Turns out the hand I had was the only one he could beat. I certainly played it like I flopped a set and was valuetowning the shit out of him. I guess it's a good call. Caus he was right. Yeah, cause that's how results orientated thinking works.

Later still, I chip up a couple of times holding AK vs Ax twice vs shorty jams. I then open Q9s in midposition (blinds 800/1600, I make it 3400) and Adam immediately makes it 13400. I sense total weakness in his bet, his demeanour etc and plan to jam on him. Then I go into tard mode. I just flat call. I should jam, I know that now. I then check a J8x flop to him because I expect to get freecards to my draw. Mistake 2. He bets 16k, I jam for 32k. He can't fold, obv. He calls with J2o and holds. Sigh. Busssssssssssssto. Completely butchered that hand. Need to get out of the habit of butchering these hands with 20 left in good value tourneys. Costing me dear, tbh.

Anyway, Monday I have a break instead of playing Aspers' NEW TOTALLY ORIGINAL (sigh) £55 with £500 added game. I make it out on Tuesday to play Circus £55 with £500 added. Basically, I'll keep my synopsis of this one short.

1. Jon Lundy owns me.
2. And a bit more.
3. And some more (checking two streets in a threebet pot in position with AQ on a QXXX dry board and then getting paid overbetting the pot on the J river when I get there with AJ)
4. I almost own Jon, but then Milo wanders over and tells Jon I'm not capable of valuebetting (in this spot) so I must be bluffing. Jon calls. I was bluffing. Round 4 to Lundy. Sigh.

5. I overplay TT against an aggrofish.

I played so badly I was horrifed. Really. Playing with Jon was fun though.He makes you think so much deeper about the game than a lot of people. He pulled one outrageous bluff against a teesider, then rubs him down by showing QJcc on a paired 3 diamond board and announcing 'yeah, you can't call with the bare Ace there, eh?' Showing bluffs are good for the game. Lol.

Anyway, on Weds night, bored I head to Stanleys. To keep it short. I own it. Really hard. And then when I have 70k (FT average is 40k, 16 left) I 3bet 'squeeze' the button with AK only for the cutoff to shove (for fuck all more, really) and show AA. Sigh.

I remain perfectly patient, still having more than the average stack and confident. As it happens, I own the FT and threehanded I'm getting short with the blinds and such and on the button I shove the Azbo in spades and find the top of Jamie Nixon's (the same cutoff from before!!) range, QQ. Flop brings a 7, but my sweat is not enough and I finish 3rd for £130. Meh. Still happy with how I played. Really well.

Now a break from poker for a while, prolly till the G Cup on bank holiday weekend. I've got a lot on at the minute with work and need to switch off from all things poker for a bit. I'll still update this if I've got interesting shit to say, or, let's be honest, otherwise.

--Mulhuzz